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KathiMurphyBayer

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I have tried to start this 3 times and keep erasing what I wrote. I am at a loss to get this down without knowing quite what I need to say.  One of my students was run over by a car yesterday and passed away on the way to the hospital.  He was only 7 years old and was walking from school to the babysitter just two streets away. I keep hearing his mother screaming in my ear asking if her baby is dead or alive.  I sat with one of the psychologists today - we had a full crisis team - but I can't get her voice out of my head. I guess I just want to ask you all to keep the Walminski family in your prayers.  Colin was an only child. Our whole school is just reeling with agony and we are struggling to try to hold it together for our kids. I am so angry at the babysitter - after this she still did not come to school to pick up her charges - just told them to walk over on the next street. Please keep the family and Ostrander Elementary School students and staff in your prayers.  I can't explain how much this hurts.

Kathi 


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JanetP67

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God Bless!

laguna_b

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Reply with quote  #3 
Kathi,
The scene you told of is quite horrific. I can easily imagine how intense the pain is for you. There is a therapy EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) which produces near miraculous results for those that have gone through similar traumas. You can find out more at EMDR.org and find the names of psychotherapists who are certified in its practice. While I found it very useful in dealing with more typical issues, it has found particular favor in applications of sudden trauma and the aftershock and "false beliefs" that develop after such an event.
One that stood out in my mind was a subway driver who had a sucide on the tracks at a station and couldn't go to that station or even operate the train. He found immediate relief starting with the first sessions. Results from this therapy typically come in the first sessions and they are deep and lasting.
Unlike regular talk therapy, EMDR seems to "rewire the brain" removing the missprocessing of an event. I highly reccomend it to all close to this event. If you want further information from me feel free to write privately.
You, the school, the family and the driver, all have my best wishes over this terrible event.
Barry


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TerrencePTuffyLSA69

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Reply with quote  #4 
What can anyone say? So sorry Kathi. I will pray for you.
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TonyCasamento69

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Reply with quote  #5 

So sorry.


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Tony Casamento '69
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Reply with quote  #6 

I'm sorry for your loss. How tragic.

Joyce

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Reply with quote  #7 

Even though I don't know you or the Walminski family, I will be praying for you in this time of tragedy. How sad that the babysitter has no remorse for picking up this child, Colin.  I can imagine the the anguish and torture the mother of the child is going through because I saw my sister-in-law and brother go through this many years ago when my nephew was killed by a teenager going through a red light. Now many years later the mother died of a broken heart to be with her son. I too recommend therapy, but in another form.  Compassionate Friends where parents of children who are killed by murderers or accidents go to be with one another. It helps also to talk about it.  A LOT!  God bless you and keep you safe in His hands!


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Joyce
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Reply with quote  #8 

Kathi,

 

What a tragic loss for Colin's family, your school and the entire world.  He is in God's hands, but you and they are left to mourn.  I and my daughter will remember Colin. his family and all who knew him, in our prayers.  And, I will give my 6 year old daughter, my only child, an extra hug and appreciate her all the more.

 

May God give you strength to handle this horror and may you remember Colin as he was before this calamity.

 

Eileen D. '70

Kathie65

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Reply with quote  #9 

Kathi,

 

You, Colin's family and your school are in my prayers.  Colin is in Our Blessed Mother's arms.

 

Kathie


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Kathleen Mackin 65
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Reply with quote  #10 
When we work in schools, our students become "our kids."   In the 23 years that I have worked in schools, there have been tragedies that we never forget.  Please know that we feel your pain and hope that someday you can move on as we all have to.  All you can really do is to be there for the other students now.  They need to lean on the adults as they try to understand something that defies comprehension.  Hold on to the fact that they need you, and bless you for helping them through this.

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Reply with quote  #11 

  So sorry for you,Kathy. The sudden death of a child is almost surreal. My thoughts and prayers are for you and the child's family and the driver. I hope you follow up on Barry's suggestion. It works.


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Marie Bluett 1970
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Reply with quote  #12 

I am so sorry.  I read the story in the paper, he was such a beautiful boy. 

Take full advantage of the crisis team and also any employee assistance that is offered.  There is nothing more horrific than losing a child.  I will keep you, Colin's family and the school staff in my prayers, so that everyone will be able to get through this. 

 

 

 

BobJohnston

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Reply with quote  #13 

Kathi,  I can understand how you feel and hope you can find a way to find peace again.  Emergency service workers who deal with tragedies like this are offered counselling, immediately following the incident.  Unfortunately, I've been to a few of them and even with the training we get, it doesn't get easier.  With adults, we can put some perspective to it, but kids stick with us.  Perhaps if you were to contact someone from the Ambulance corps that responded, they can put you in touch with someone who can help.  Perhaps you may be able to work things out by talking to someone who is directly involved with this incident.  Yet, remember that while this young life has been taken from it's mortal being, this boy lives on with the Saints and will keep watch over his loved ones forever, without the sufferings this life would have bestowed on him.  May he rest in eternal peace.


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